counting days to Syawal

ramadhan is coming to an end.. for me la..since this wknd dah nak blk kg and won't be logging in till I come back to KL.. so how's Ramadhan so far?

- alhamdulillah.. looks like no of days i have to ganti this yr has reduced by half ;-)

- alhamdulillah, dpt buat terawih much2 better than last year.. tadarrus fail la.. baca Quran sendiri2 je.. still ade a few days more to go.. hope can make full use of it..

- my decision few months back was suddenly challenged by myself? and after stressful days thinking and thinking and thinking.. with free consultation with bonda n rakan2 yg setia.. and the most important..and on top of all, the forever free consultation with Allah swt.. He sent me an instinct.. yup.. it's now confirmed..and no turning back!!

- finally.. another prayer was answered.. though i was not that happy with some part of it (but i guess, i have expected it already, somehow, someway).. I believe it's the best.. i admit, sometimes i do still hope for some explanation..but i guess, certain things are better left unsaid..

- i still didn't go to any pasar Ramadhan.. oh, maybe one la kot kat pkns shah alam.. but it was only 3.30pm and ade 2-3 gerai je yg bukak.. boleh kira ke tuh??

- while my teammates think the work load has reduced, i feel like it was the busiest month ever!! perhaps it's one of the dugaan during this Ramadhan.. suddenly all those pasive customers jadi sgt active plak.. pastu semua la jadi urgent..tak pasal.. mmg mencabar kesabaran betul!

- my boss wrote in his email.."how long more before the Ramadhan ends? I know you are hungry but i think it increases your sense of humor ;-) " .... hahaha... i think it's actually sbb stress level yg increase tu yg jadi weng sikit..

- i bought white sandals!! caya tak caya.. kalau abg ade, sure dia akan terpengsan sbb surprise kot! hahaha.. i have always hated any light colored footware except sport shoes.. even the light-beige colored shoes he gave as hantaran pun tak pernah pakai ok! i remember there was this one day he came home citer ade a lady colleague pakai white shoes to match her pants.. and he just smiled to himself sbb teringat how i always said it made me look like a nurse.. hehe..

- not much difference than last year in terms of the missing, the reminiscing, the "how i wish", the "he would have...", the "we could have".., the "if only"... but i think the "why", "how could" have lessen a little bit.. guess over time, i have acquired some skills and developed my own "how to" guidelines to handle things.. thank God for His guide..

- at this moment, i'm still in "blues".. just few more days to go before raya.. trying as much as I can to avoid things that can bring my mood down even lower than where i already am now.. i hope Allah swt will forgive me for being a little bit selfish this time.. i just have to put my feelings as my priority now though i know it is going to hurt some people.. because i am really hoping for a happier raya this time.. insya Allah...


SELAMAT HARI RAYA EVERYONE.. IF I HAVE OFFENDED YOU IN ANY SHAPE OR FORM, PLEASE ACCEPT MY SINCERE APOLOGIES.. MAY YOU HAVE A BLESSFUL RAYA WITH YOUR LOVED ONES.. TAKE CARE AND HAVE FUN!