how was raya? well.. it was a blessed one.. certain part of it may not be even close to what i wished for, but Allah swt granted me with something else as compensation. perhaps some items in the wish list don't really deserve to be there and Allah has amended the list. I'm grateful and thankful for everything, for every wish Allah swt made come true, for all those that He turned down, and for each and every other thing He gave me.. I couldn't ask for more.
it may not be the greatest raya or the happiest raya i've ever had. but i think i learnt something. i learnt there are other forms of happiness that i can still have, instead of hoping hopelessly for something i cannot have, ever. i learnt having our loved ones do make us happy, but they may not always keep us happy. i learnt when we think too much about ourselves, we sometimes don't realize that we are hurting people around us who don't deserve to be hurt. i learnt while we are busy with our lives, other people are busy with theirs. how could we ever ask them to understand what we are going through, when we couldn't care less to think about what they have to go through. why do we think our pain is the hardest one to bear, how do we rate them?
we gained something, we lost something. that's part and parcel of life. it's only the 5th day of Syawal.. may it be a very meaningful month to us all, though the meaning may be different according to our own dictionary and may change depending on its version..
the most decent picture of erina that i managed to capture.she was super hyper on that day.she warned me "mummy, don't cry. nanti takleh raya..." :-)
2 comments:
Well said, dear!! You hit it right on the spot. I learnt a lot of things too this raya. I finally told myself off: "this is going to be the life that you're gonna go through for the rest of your life and stop looking back at the past hoping to change it". The truth can be hard to swallow but swallow it we must, kan??
We may not be able to relive the 'happiness' we once had, but Allah has granted us some other form of happiness and for that we should be thankful, alhamdulillah...
We'll hold each other's hand through this, k? ;-) (hugs)
sis, sometimes i wonder if we are now at the 'acceptance' phase? or is this us, trying to saiko our mind to stay strong? but whatever it is, i think i like this 'me'. rasa lega when i don't try to push myself too much for something i know i cannot do. but u know too well kan, how the rollercoaster works..hope when it goes down, it doesn't hit too low and hope it climbs up quickly..
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