do you think i'm strong?

A few weeks back, i have a short chat with a friend who then told me "I think you are strong"..my reply, "you think so? i guess i have to.. for my daughter" then all the way sampai rumah i keep on thinking.. it reminds me to the time he was asking me "do you think I'm strong??" hemh.. is that how ppl see me? do i really look "strong" to their eyes? what makes them have that impression? because i don't cry?or bcoz i can go to work? or bcoz i smile? or bcoz i'm still breathing?? what is it? well, it may seem like a small matter.. but i really wanted to know why did they say that? Even myself can't tell if i'm strong or what? I have to go to work, i have to take care of my daughter, i have to not cry, i have to do it no matter how much i say i don't want to.. does that make me a strong person? personally, i'm not sure how to label myself.. i sometimes find myself not wanting to think that he's gone.. and i just tell myself he's with me.. somewhere.. i'm not trying to deny the fact, but i just can feel his presence in a special way that nobody can ever understand..and i'm very comfortable with it. i don't cry..hemh, is it so? well perhaps not in front of public.. coz i don't think it's worth.. and i don't want people to think that i'm asking for their sympathy.. my tears are saved for some other special time which people don't have to know..well, regardless whether i am really strong, or i just look strong..it doesn't change the fact that i miss him terribly and i can't even get him out of my mind. it also doesn't change the fact that sometimes i still wish this is all just a dream and i wish i can have him back!! it's like i'm having a dvd player in my head that continuously playing pictures of him, of us.. all those times..those moments..which make me cry all the time down inside. i fought hard not to cry in front of my daughter especially.. i don't want her to feel that she's lack of "something" not even a tiny bit..i want her to grow up like other kids despite what happen.. she might not know her daddy, but hey, I know him pretty well.. I will make sure she "knows" her daddy one day..but of course, daddy's love can never be replaced by anything.. insya Allah, God has saved that for her in the afterlife.. as long as she continue pray for her daddy, the connection will always be there.. I believe that's the best ever gift a daughter can give to her parents..after all she still has her "super-mum" who loves her so very much that nothing in the world can match!!;-)